If the auto industry can do it, why shouldn’t football?
Germany and the Netherlands have been waiting for a big trophy for 16 and 24 years respectively. Both will travel to South Africa with ambitious and quality teams. Both teams have to deal with a few understrength positions too, though. So I decided to follow Uli Hoeness’ and Louis van Gaal’s example at Bayern Munich and see what a Dutch-German hybrid national team could look like and what it could achieve.
Formation: 4-2-3-1
A 4-2-3-1 seems to be the formation of choice for Bert van Marwijk and Jogi Löw has also done some experimenting with it during the Euros and recent World Cup qualifiers. While I prefer a clean 4-4-2 for Germany, a 4-2-3-1 is a good compromise and with the Dutch influence should certainly work better than what Jogi Löw assembled in the past.
Neuer
Manuel Neuer is playing a flawless season at Schalke, is strong on the line and in command of his penalty box. He can save penalties and for a goalkeeper is a pretty good football player too. His goal kicks and throws are a real weapon and ideal for rapid counter attacks.
Lahm – Mertesacker – Boateng – van der Wiel
Joris Mathijsen could be an experienced and solid alternative to Boateng, but Mertesacker already brings a greater ability to anticipate attacks and organize a defense, so I will rather take Boateng’s pace and proficiency in one on one situations. Höwedes and Hummels would be first rate alternatives as well. Neither Germany or the Netherlands managed to produce a great right-back recently though, which might be the only weaker position in this team.
De Jong – Schweinsteiger
Since Louis van Gaal found Schweinsteiger a new position in Bayern’s midfield, he suddenly looks like the midfielder he promised to be but never lived up to four years ago. Alongside de Jong with his heart, tackles and workrate the two will be everywhere to clean up the midfield and support the attack and defense.
Elia – Özil – Sneijder
Technique, vision, creativity, pace and work rate of the highest order. You might want Özil and Elia to be a little bit older and mature, but I’m willing to take that gamble.
van Persie
I haven’t seen any of the current crop of German strikers perform effectively in a one striker setup so far. With the quality of service this player is going to get though, you could argue that an expert finisher like maybe van Nistelrooy would be a better pick.
Coach: Bert van Marwijk
Van Marwijk speaks German and Dutch, while Löw only speaks Swabian. Without any Stuttgart players in this team to translate, this could cause major communication problems. I personally also have my doubts about Löw’s qualities as a tournament and big match coach. Van Marwijk has yet to prove his abilities here, and as such receives the benefit of the doubt. He is being accused of favoritism though, which could mean he will somehow try and force Mark van Bommel into this team. But that’s still better than Löw’s Stuttgart favoritism, which might land Thomas Hitzelsperger a World Cup ticket. I chose the lesser of two evils.
Bench: Michael Ballack, Johan Cruyff
I’m a generous person and I always want people to do well and achieve their dreams in life. I don’t really need them in the team, but would sub them in late in the second half of the World Cup final, so they finally get their hands on the big one. Condition is though, that they don’t act as dressing room cancers. Ideally both spent most of their time in their hotel rooms. Ballack can watch LOST episodes on DVD. Cruyff can toy around with formations for the Catalan national team, for the next important friendly against a team coached by Diego Maradonna.
So, that’s my Dutch-German hybrid. Six German players, five Dutch players and one Dutch coach. I received word from German and Dutch diplomats that they approve of this selection. But you could obviously still tinker with this lineup and optimize it further I guess. It’s a team that will peak early and then defy physics by picking up steam still as the tournament progresses. It will win beautiful, ugly and on penalties. It will take an early lead and score four more on counter attacks. It will fall behind twice and come back thrice. It’s certainly a better bet to win the World Cup than either Germany or the Netherlands alone.
Now, which other country could join your national team to help turn it into world beaters? You can take the easy route and always pick Brazil or Spain of course. But you could also be more creative and/or you could factor in aspects like language and culture to create a hybrid that wouldn’t just look good on paper.
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