World Cup 2010 Blog: Gimme Hope Joachim: The Remix.

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Gimme Hope Joachim: The Remix. Posted: 21 Dec 2010 11:10 AM PST Fairly sure this was completely missed during the World Cup, but if not, it’s certainly no crime to post again. Actually, it may be illegal in several countries not to post it again. You’ll probably remember the a-capella Gimme Hope Joachim song from pre-World Cup, because it was the best thing without umlauts to arrive from Germany this year. Well, turns out they made a remix at some point during the World Cup to aptly reflect what had transpired. And it’s predictably the best thing since sliced bread mit Nutella. Lyrics after the jump. German: Gimme Hope Joachim gimme hope, joachim hope for Südafrika. Die Afrikaner haben Vuvuzelas, die Engländer die haben Humor, die Australier haben ne starke Abwehr, aber wier haben das schönste Tor Die Spanier Haben die tollsten schiris der Ronaldo hat ne Traum Figur David Backam der hat nen Fuß aus Stahl doch Jogi Löw hat die schönste Frisur OOOhh Gimme hope Joachim Gimme hope joachim hope joachim for the Weltpokal gimme hope joachim gimme hope joachim hope for Südafrika Die Koreaner zeigen Emotionen Die Mexikaner haben nen harten Schuss Die Italiener haben nen guten mann im Tor aber wir haben den größten Bus Die Franzosen halten fest zusamen und die Engländer haben Sex Tabu Die Argentinier quälen sich im Jungelcamp nur der Jogi schmiert Nutellabrot OOOhh gimme hope joachim gimme hope joachim gimme hope joachim for the weltpokal gimme hope joachim gimme hope joachim hope for Südafrika Die Serben sind die Überflieger und wie geschmiert läufts für die USA die Holländer sind immer noch dabei Aber trotzdem holt uns Jogi den Pokal Ohh gimme hope joachim gimme hope joachim hope for the Weltpokal Gimme hope Joachim gimme hope joachim hope for Südafrika Ohh English via Google Translate: Gimme Hope Joachim gimme hope, joachim hope for South Africa. The Africans have vuvuzelas, The English have humor The Australians have ne strong defense, But wier have the best goal The Spaniards have really great refs Ronaldo has the perfect body ne David Backam has NEN foot steel But Jogi Löw has the most beautiful hairstyle OOOhh Gimme Hope Joachim Gimme hope joachim hope joachim for the World Cup gimme hope joachim gimme hope joachim hope for South Africa The Koreans show emotions The Mexicans have a HART shot The Italians have NEN good man in goal but we have the largest bus The French hold on together, and the English have sex taboo The Argentine torture in Jungelcamp only Jogi bread smeared Nutella OOOhh gimme hope joachim gimme hope joachim gimme hope joachim for the world cup gimme hope joachim gimme hope joachim hope for South Africa The Serbs are the flyer and smoothly running for the U.S. the Dutch are still at it, but still gets us Jogi ‘Cup Ohh gimme hope joachim gimme hope joachim hope for the World Cup Gimme Hope Joachim gimme hope joachim hope for South Africa Ohh

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World Cup 2010 Blog: Drifting Towards A Winter World Cup

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Drifting Towards A Winter World Cup Posted: 17 Dec 2010 10:10 AM PST One of the major concerns, if not the major concern, of the World Cup in Qatar has been that pesky issue of its location – a very, very warm location. The summers are scorching and though their big promise to world football was air conditioned stadiums, as many have said: you can’t air condition Qatar. Though they damn well might try. With this in mind, figures have been popping up advocating a winter World Cup, touting its possibilities. Only they’re not just figures, they’re powerful figures, with titles and clout behind them; names like Beckenbauer and Platini. And, much as we may not like him, the most powerful name of all: Sepp. Blatter told a press conference in Abu Dhabi where the club World Cup is taking place that he too supported a winter World Cup. “It is important to play when the climate is appropriate and I’m thinking about the footballers, not only the fans but the actors,” he said. “Personally I think it would be better that it is played in the winter … but it’s not easy to realise.” I’m fascinated by this for one reason and one reason only; one which has nothing at all to do with heat, but rather one of the more underrated aspects of the World Cup: midseason form. It’s not some fallacy or media-derived buzzword; it’s very, very real. Equally as real as the fact that the majority of the best players in the World Cup, those plying their club trade in Europe, partake in the World Cup after a gruelling domestic season, many of them with little left in the tank but adrenaline and their childhood dreams. Often enough, but less than ideal. Now imagine you take those players, the best in the world, and toss them into the World Cup at peak fitness, peak form, and with a topped-up tank with which to dazzle the world. The summer World Cup may be tradition, but once, just once, we have to see a winter World Cup, for the sake of football itself. It may be unlike anything we’ve ever seen before, on a number of fronts.

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World Cup 2010 Blog: Nicolas Anelka’s French Door Swung Open

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Nicolas Anelka’s French Door Swung Open Posted: 15 Dec 2010 10:06 AM PST Memories are short in football, but none more so than those in the Les Bleus camp. Despite everything seemingly going fine and dandy under Laurent Blanc at the moment – four straight victories – at least one man in the camp just can’t seem to quit Nicolas Anelka, their World Cup pariah (one of ‘em, anyway). It’s like watching the girl just back on her feet stumble back to the abusive ex-boyfriend. Why won’t they ever learn? Man of epic name, Alain Boghossian, speaks: “I’ve seen a lot of Chelsea matches … no-one is banned. However, he may have banned himself. He said he did not want to wear the jersey of the team. What can we do – pull his hair to make him come? It will be difficult because he does not have much hair! “We can’t keep talking about absent players though; we have to move on.” Your confusion is forgiven. Nicolas Anelka’s career in international football was in effect brought to an end today after he was given an 18-match ban for his role in France’s controversial mutiny during the World Cup in June. Also confused are Franck Ribery, whose suspension was just lifted, and Patrice Evra, still riding out his five game timeout for a failed mutiny. The 18 games Anelka is supposedly banned for would run up…well, don’t really know, because he’d only reach 14 at the end of Euro 2012 qualifying. With this under consideration and Anelka at an advanced int’l age, you’d have to imagine the French federation is considering lessening their sanctions. Perhaps someone in the French media, Canal+ possibly, decided that with Ribery and Evra possibly returning, the potential for another tabloid-centric meltdown of international proportions was just too good to pass up. Of course whether or not they can convince Anelka is another matter entirely. They can’t, as they say, pull his hair, but I’m sure someone could send him a text message.

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World Cup 2010 Blog: Sepp Speaketh, Advises Against Sodomy In 2022.

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Sepp Speaketh, Advises Against Sodomy In 2022. Posted: 14 Dec 2010 08:36 AM PST Difficult though it may be to see him atop the sport’s most powerful acronym, Sepp Blatter still remains the gift that keeps on giving. The man’s motormouth is a 365 day-a-year Santa Claus, bestowing us with gifts under the tree, never a hint of oversaturation, on all topics. Yesterday the world’s press sat down with Sepp and he touched on the all-important subject: sodomy. (Link’s kosher – promise.) Apart from the searing temperatures expected during the finals time of June and July, there could also be other problems with hosting the competition in an Islamic country. Gay groups fear problems in a country where homosexuality is illegal. When asked about such issues, Blatter, apparently joking, said: "I would say they should refrain from any sexual activities." Sepp then turned to the audience and offered up an accepted alternative to sodomy via hand gesture: Should this not suffice, he outlined maximum parameters for the quiet enjoyment of said activities. Sepp then asked for silence so that he could enter into a state of visualization, and the room quickly emptied.

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