World Cup 2010 Blog: “Nicolas Anelka Enjoys Comedy, Cannot Be Fired” plus 1 more

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Nicolas Anelka Enjoys Comedy, Cannot Be Fired Posted: 18 Aug 2010 02:25 PM PDT Yesterday Daryl pondered whether or not Nicolas Anelka’s international is over. Nicolas has weighed in on the subject himself, apparently being banned from Disqus as well as Les Bleus, going with the well-worn but undoubtedly effective “you can’t fire me, I quit!” – but probably in French. In other words: nothing’s changed since June. Anelka’s response: “Who told them that I wanted to play in blue again?” Anelka asked. “I should not even have been mentioned by this kind of commission. For me, ever since the South Africa World Cup, the French team is part of the past.” “For me, this whole thing with the commission is an aberration, a masquerade to make sure they don’t lose face,” he said. “They have punished a void, as Nicolas Anelka never existed in this pitiful and colourful affair. I repeat: the page with les Bleus was turned on 19 June when I was evicted from Knysna.” Referring to the French football authorities, he added: “They are real clowns, these people … I am doubled up with laughter.” Last I checked, clowns that make you laugh are generally a good think, particularly those of the French variety. His agent, meanwhile, has said that he was planning to quit all along, so the halftime outburst was just one last middle finger on the way out the international door. “With Nico, we had a very clear career plan,” he said. “The idea was that he would take his leave internationally after the World Cup, whatever its result, which ended up being the one that everyone knows.” And with that from his agent, our theory is confirmed: Nicolas was planning to play at least two more years, and this ban effectively retired him. The rest is simply the continuation of this French fiasco.

The Battle For Germany’s Soul Rages On Posted: 18 Aug 2010 10:30 AM PDT There are two things Michael Ballack doesn’t do: i. Win tournament finals. ii. Give up the German captaincy without a fight. Or a half-Nelson. When Ballack went down before the World Cup, the band was handed over to that 12 year old fullback from Munich and with a good bit of success, in the process deciding he doesn’t want to give it back. This displeases Michael Ballack. The grumbling in the press has gone on for weeks and it seems the only way to settle the matter is a steel cage match to the death, with the winner getting the band and a free Wii. Michael, like any good athlete, has already declared the winner before this landmark battle occurs, predictably crowning himself the victor. “For me, the matter is clear,” Ballack told Soccernet. “I’m the captain of Germany and intend to take on the role again when I’m fit. I can’t wait to lead Germany into the Euro 2012 qualifiers and make a success of it. I believe in myself as the captain and think I’ve the personality to do it. But the German public has spoken, and in resounding fashion: they want Lahm. German sports agency SID, an AFP subsidiary, authorised a poll which saw 60.3 percent of those surveyed say Bayern Munich defender Lahm should remain captain having led Germany to third at the World Cup. Only 26.2 percent of those polled thought Ballack, who missed the 2010 World Cup with an ankle injury, should be made captain for Germany’s first Euro 2012 qualifier against Belgium in Brussels on September 3. It means very little, but says so very much, and leads to the theory there’s only one way this will end up: in tears.

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